The Same Thing Lady

The first customer of the day for me today was not pleasant, to say the least. I began work at 11 am and we were having our usual lull between the breakfast and the lunch crowd. BEEP – my headset rings to alert me that there is a customer waiting to place an order. It’s not really a beep, but I can’t spell a word that describes the sound it makes.

“Hi, can I help you?” I start cheerfully.

“I’m going to take a few minutes if you don’t mind, to look at the menu.”

A couple of things are wrong with this already. First, yes I MIND, the drive thru is supposed to be quick and efficient. If you don’t know what you want, why did you pull up to the speaker? Second – A FEW MINUTES? Are you studying the menu for some fast food exam? A moment is annoying enough, but a few minutes? C’MON! There’s a timer in here and I have a job to do. I have to be polite though, “Alright, no rush, let me know when you’re ready.”

This lady MEANT a few minutes. For two and a half minutes I listen to back and forth chatter between her and her passenger. “Well, I want this, but I don’t know if it’s enough… Maybe I should get that… Or maybe this instead”… and on and on and on. You’re not in a focus group discussing ou menu here, and then FINALLY she starts placing her order. This was another two minute ordeal, which at some points included both passengers talking at the same time, neither seeming to be familiar with the menu at all. This is not an acceptable way to place an order, but I’ve been dealing with people like this on a daily basis forever, so we struggle through it and she proceeds up to the window.

The driver is a BIG lady, and I’m not one to judge, but she’s wearing a zip up hooded sweatshirt that says ‘police’ across the front. Yeah, right. What are you, the captain of the cheeseburger police? Ridding our planet of cheeseburgers five or six at a time? Obviously working overtime? As I’m giving her the order, I give her a tray filled with her drinks first. “And here are your colas for the combos and the juice for the kids meal.”

In what must have been her rudest tone “Uh yeah, we’re missing a juice.”

I normally never speak to a customer in a confrontational tone, but this fatty was pushing my buttons. I looked at the display screen that shows the order. “I only have one kids meal rang in here.”

With a sharp tone she replies “Yeah, well we ordered two.”

We have several different choices for kids meals. “Oh, must be my mistake then.” (For the record, I don’t think it was, but what can ya do?)

“Yeah because we ordered two.” Thanks, I got that the first time you said it, 12 seconds ago. “I’ll get you what you ordered, which kids meal was it?”

“Same thing!” she snaps. Oh man, it’s all I can do to restrain myself from yelling into the kitchen, ‘I screwed up  and I need a SAME THING over here.’  I instead go into the kitchen and advise the employees that I need another kids meal made the same way as the last one.

Once I have the kids meal I bring it to her with a smile. This ray of sunshine glares up at me “There’s no tomato on my chicken sandwich right?”

DID YOU ORDER NO TOMATO? If that’s what you ordered, then that’s what I rang in. Unfortunately, I LEFT MY X-RAY GLASSES AT HOME AND I CAN SEE THROUGH THAT BAG ABOUT AS WELL AS YOU CAN. I didn’t personally make the sandwich, nor do I have time to watch everything the kitchen does. I look to the screen, it says no tomato, “Nope, that’s what I rang it, so no tomato on your sandwich!”

I hope there were two tomatoes on that sandwich.

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38 responses to this post.

  1. No tomatoes but THREE slices of cheese, extra mayo and bacon. And I bet you a nickel that the cola was a diet one. Am I right? LMAO

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  2. Can I be ugly and hope the drinks spill on her?

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  3. Cheeseburger police, I love it!

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  4. I feel your pain. Come on. We have 90 freakin’ seconds to take your order and give it to you… I got very good at memorizing everything so I would listen to their crazy freakin’ orders and then plug it in after everything was decided to reduce times. And I judged too… it’s really hard not to judge when the same person comes in for breakfast, lunch, and dinner… :p

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  5. Wow. What a bitch. This is why you hear stories of people spitting in other people’s food. Don’t worry, I’m sure both tires on the driver’s side blew out just a few minutes after she left.

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  6. I love the cheeseburger police line term. Hilarious.

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  7. I give you a ton of credit for your patience! It must be tough to deal with idiot customers when “the customer is always right?” Keep up the great stories!

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    • There are several customers who are hardly ever right. The unfortunate thing is I can’t tell them that! Not all though, these are just the tales of the worst ones. There are some people out there who know how to place a fast food order! Thank you for the comment, and I will keep up the stories, as the general population seems to be FULL of material!

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  8. Omg. A blog about drive thru experiences. Being a slave to mcdonalds. I can so relate. #Newfavoriteblog.

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  9. There is no way I can hide my emotions so there is no way I could ever have your job. I really can’t believe that my daughter is a waitress as she never holds back. Her best story yet is when someone asked what was in the blackbean soup. Or if there were beans in the blackbean soup, I can’t remember. I can’t believe how horrible and stupid people are. But then again between you and her I am starting to be afraid to go out and eat.

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    • You shouldn’t be afraid to go out and eat so long as you’re a decent human being, and know how to treat others! A lot of people ask REALLY stupid questions but most don’t, and even the ones that do, if they follow the Golden rule, they’re alright!

      Reply

  10. Hi Drive Thru Guy! Thanks to your blog, I’ve learned so much about the other side of the drive thru experience. Hats off for keeping your sense of humor and sharing it with the blogosphere. You are a riot! :o)

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  11. Reblogged this on oyiabrown.

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  12. My pet peeve is people in a long line at a movie theatre concession stand or fast food place and when they get to the counter say “I’ll have popcorn” “What size?” “oh -ah….medium, and a soft drink”. “What size?” “oh….small” “and what drink would you like” “Oh…what have you got” – like you haven’t had 6.5 minutes of standing there looking at the giant board with the sample size cups and containers to make your choice already??? My movie is starting in :45 seconds….ARGH

    Reply

  13. Posted by Leslie A. Knox on May 16, 2012 at 2:55 am

    Thanks for stopping by my blog – I love this post as a former food service work among all the jobs I had dealing with the public, I feel your pain. These are people that have NO idea what real work is and probably never worked in food service a day in their life.

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  14. Omygoodness. I work with the public and reading this is like looking through a diary of my own thoughts!

    Reply

  15. Posted by aparnanairphotography on May 22, 2012 at 4:41 am

    Hilarious!! I don’t know how you contained your annoyance. Back when I used to work at Victorias Secret, we used to have occasional customers like this…except that they would throw attitudes about G-string thongs instead of cheeseburgers.

    Reply

  16. I love this post, you made my day. Happy to know others feel like me, but nevertheless sorry for ourselves that we have to deal with these sickos everyday.

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  17. Spent a mite too long dealing with the general public as well. Usually an apology with a smile is enough to get them on your side. Obviously not for the woman who should be keeping well away from all things edible.

    In London, where I spent much of my life, it could even have customers grovelling shamefully before you, as most staff in the Disunited Queendom soon get told the customer is always wrong, and a few steps down the social ladder from the average waiter, shop assistant, office clerk etc, etc, etc. Think that’s changed quite a lot. Pity, it could be extremely funny to observe, if you weren’t directly involved.

    Nice little vignette, thanks for sharing.

    Reply

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