The Blue Car Lady

This is an open letter to the lady in the blue car that passed my window but it needs an introduction that contains a little background. Here it is: We have an employee on staff named Kenny. Kenny is Filipino. Kenny came here looking to make a better life for his family – which I assume is what my ancestors did at some point seeing as I’m not Native American Indian with my entire bloodline born and raised here. His English is fantastic, and he’s damn good in the drive thru. He should be, I trained him myself.

He often works in the drive thru when I’m not there, and sometimes with me when I am there. Today was one of the times when I was there working with him. We had a customer asking for a poutine with her combo, but she was also asking for the fry and drink to be upsized. Dumb bitch.

You cannot upsize a poutine.

Customer: I’ll get the number four combo with a poutine and cola.

Kenny: Alright, is there anything else?

Customer: Can you upsize the fry and drink?

Kenny: I thought you wanted a poutine?

Customer: Can you upsize the fry and drink?

Kenny: Do you want a fry AND a poutine?


Kenny:  We cannot upsize a poutine ma’am.


Kenny: Ok, $8.50, first widow please.

The woman drives up, pays, and then advances to the second window. Kenny gives her the upsized cola. She asks him to talk to me. Please realize that she DID NOT ask for a manager, she asked for me, apparently because I’m Canadian.

I go over to the window, “Is there something I can help you with?”

She starts “Yeah, the last couple of times I came here, the employee, and it’s always that guy (pointing to Kenny) can’t understand me. We’re in Canada here; you guys need to get some Canadians in the drive thru that speak English.”

I was kind of shocked. I didn’t really know how to respond to (yes, I know I said once before that I don’t think cunt is ever an appropriate term to use, but) this racist cunt. I stammered a bit and said “Well ma’am, he works here full time and is always in the drive thru, he serves several hundred other people each day and everything seems to be fine. I’m an employee that works for this company, I don’t hire the other employees, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with him, or his English. Would you like to speak to the manager?”

“No, just, whatever, I’ve said my piece, let your manager know and hire some English people, I think I’m speaking pretty clear English.”

“Ok,” I said and handed her the food. “Did you need anything else?”

“No.” She took the food and drove off.

Kenny asked me, “What did she say?”

“Nothing, don’t worry about it,” I said.

“She hates me because I’m not Canadian, I heard her” he responded.

“Whatever, don’t worry about it, she was a fucking bitch” I replied.

This is an employee who wants nothing more than a better life for his family and he was just put down for no reason other than his different nationality by one of the stupidest bitches I have EVER dealt with. I assume she was born and raised here. That’s really too bad, she should have been an abortion.

I asked the guy who collected the money if she said anything to him and he told me that he has seen the same lady once before and she had the same attitude.

The more I thought about it after, the more it upset me. If I didn’t need this job, there are so many different things I could have said to her:

-“Oh do you hate everyone that isn’t white?” followed by a nice window slam.

-“If you don’t like it, then don’t fucking eat here.” followed by spitting on her.

-“FIRE IN THE HOLE” as I over hand threw the food bag into her car like a grenade.

-“Hold on a minute while I get the manager” then unzip my pants and piss into her car. “Here’s the manager and I think he wants me to kick you the fuck out.”

I told my boss about this by asking “Would I get in trouble if I told someone to fuck off?”

I’ve been there for a long time, and I’ve worked side by side with this guy for years so he obviously realized that I didn’t say that. “Probably not,” he responds “but so I can cover for you, what did you do?”

That made me smile, and I explained what had happened. He pulled Kenny into the conversation at this point, told him to forget about it because some people are fucking assholes and advised him that the next time she wanted to talk to someone to get him specifically and he would tell her to “Stick her nine dollars up her inappropriate-for-Canadian-society-ass.” I swear, I don’t get raises for making my boss look good in my blog, he’s just so awesome that his comments always come up. Seriously, he doesn’t even know I have a blog.

Unfortunately, I need to keep my job so I can’t speak freely to customers at work and my only forum for complaint is this blog. If I could get away with saying what I felt, I would. So here is the open letter:

Dear Racist Cunt,

Go fuck yourself and never come here again. I would never consider doing something bad to a customer’s food, but I wouldn’t feel bad about shitting in your pop glass. Do the World a favour, and go die.


Drive Thru Guy


14 responses to this post.

  1. People like that are what’s wrong with the world..

    On a positive note, HAHA. “You cannot upsize a poutine.” Man, everyone knows that.. right? Sheesh..


  2. Hmmmm, and here I thought racism was an American thing…


  3. “Shitting in your pop glass” is an absolutely beautiful line. Although I will say I had to look up what on earth a poutine is. ;o) I imagine she was using racism to hide her own embarassment at not understanding the ordering system. I hope your friend was ok.


  4. Next time you should do the fire in hole bit. That would be awesome and so well deserved!


  5. Filipino here! Ggrr.. but thanks to you. Say Hi to Kenny from me. 🙂


  6. Using the racist bitch routine to hide her own ineptitude at understanding a basic rule of the restaurant. I bet she thinks all other ethnicities look the same, too.


  7. More reason to lose faith some faith in humanity! At least most people aren’t like that, I hope.


  8. What a stupid cow. Unfortunately there are people like her in every country of the world. Dumb as fuck with little hope for improvement. If she appears again just tell her that you find it sad anytime you come across a racist but you know she can’t help being narrow-minded. She was born that way.


  9. Wow. Some people really have to do some research on how to use or expand their minds. That poop-eater could use some of it. Or better yet needs to join “How To Feel Better With My Low IQ So I Couldn’t Use My Self-hate To Be Rude To Other People” meetings. The cunt!


  10. […] tells very insightful stories about, well,  life in the drive thru . My favorites are: The blue car lady and A tale of two […]


  11. Drivethru guy – you guy/s put up with a lot! I enjoy reading your funny posts and especially how you keep your cool when really you’d probably like to send some of the drivethru patrons on a one way trip to Mars right? Anyway keep the laughter coming – I have nominated your blog for the Sunshine Award: And just quietly I think you should toss a couple of laxatives in the milkshakes of some of your ‘favourite’ customers.


  12. […] About « The Blue Car Lady […]


  13. here’s my montreal experience: i went to a tim horton’s joint in st. laurent and when it was my time i had my coffee and tendered payment. the girl looks at me and said “we do not accept american dollars.” i looked at her and said softly: “i want this coffee.” she answered me with the same. i noticed the line was getting long. the manager went out and told her “just give him his coffee”. i got my coffee and turn around and tossed my $5 bill over the counter. “i paid my coffee before going out of here, right?” thanks for the blog on the blue car lady, we reposted it and gave you back the credit and re-link. ciao!


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